我最近换了工作。原单位的同事大多人过中年，而新单位同事的年龄大多只有我的一半左右。如今，每当我答应参加一个会议，同事们就会说我"太酷了"、"了不起"。新同事们津津乐道的电视节目，我通通一无所知。他们引领（我们可以这么说吧）的社交生活似乎也比我活跃和讲究得多。
我应该试着合群一点吗？还是该继续当一个老古董，一种类似于年长亲戚的尴尬人物？帮帮忙！
咨询师，男，53岁
露西的回答：
假如你的年轻同事真的把你看作一位令人尴尬的年长亲戚，那就糟糕了。不过我表示怀疑。在我看来，讲话得体、不看《The X Factor》之类的电视节目，并不是什么特别令人尴尬的事情。我也怀疑他们是否认为你年纪太大。你才53岁，再干个一、二十年也没问题。而且我敢肯定，他们不会把你看作亲戚。没有人会把"以办公室为家"这种话当真。
另一方面，假如他们把你看作老古董，那也不失为一件好事。你年纪越来越大，你是"古董"，你的裤腰比他们的高。身为古董无疑是件好事，说明你的年轻同事隐隐约约对你有兴趣——总好过漠视你，或者对你怀有敌意。总的来说，在职场上与众不同应该算是优势。如果我是你，我会强调、而不是试图消除和别人的差异。
所以，你根本不需要试着融入他们。老实说，假如你朝着这个方向努力，几乎肯定会让自己显得荒唐可笑，并且必败无疑。53岁的人应该有信心不去在乎自己是否合群。想必你已有不少朋友，也无意参与年轻人那种劳心伤神的社交生活。相反，对你来说，重要的应该是那些年轻同事能够尊重你，认为你的观点或许值得聆听。
有一点你没提：你觉得你那些年轻的同事们怎么样？他们让你开心吗？如果没有，那说明你还不能和他们融洽相处。你不必融入他们，但你的确需要对他们表现出兴趣。就算没兴趣也要装有兴趣。摆出兴趣盎然的样子，他们会更喜欢你。装啊装的，日后也许你就真的会喜欢上他们。
一位已过花甲之年的朋友最近从一家律师事务所退休，他说，他唯一念念不忘的就是工作中能够和年轻人相处。
其实我觉得你很幸运。假如只是参加一个会议，就有人说我太酷了，我会很喜欢。如此淳朴的热情感觉很美好。
读者的建议：
上了年纪更要酷
在一个满是"新新人类"的办公室里，有几位头发花白的人，是大好的事情。仅凭年纪，你不费吹灰之力就会享有威信。
你应该想办法彰显这一点，比如，穿永远经典的衣服，谈论文化艺术时把永远经典的作品挂在嘴上，向同事们推荐永远经典的餐馆。渐渐地，你可能会发现有同事开始学你穿衣，模仿你讲话，和你去同样的餐馆吃午餐。太酷了！
头发花白的男董事，42岁
提供不同视角
你就是需要表现得酷酷的。年长的人仍然往往比较贵，比较缺少干劲，学习东西也比较慢。
要配得上你的薪水，你必须展现出自己的价值。年纪大不是借口，除非你有幸在日本工作。50多岁的人要显得酷，你需要为大家带来新的视角。
咨询师，男，58岁
保持身体健康
去健身吧！健康会带来活力，让年龄靠边站。我是认真的。
男，匿名
华丽丽
我遇到同样的事情时，会用诸如"妙极了"、"太棒了"、"华丽丽"之类的词语。
几周后，年轻人不再对我冷嘲热讽，反而开始模仿我了。
潮流引导者，男，49岁
好汉要提当年勇
最让20来岁的年轻人感兴趣的，莫过于和昔日繁华盛世相关的传说。
假如他们大谈特谈自己的健康生活方式，政治正确的格拉诺拉麦片系列，你就讲讲撒切尔时代伦敦金融城的故事。你很快就会受到崇拜，变得与众不同，也不会让你丧失可信度。
男，33岁
发挥己之所长
祝贺你在53岁之龄找到新工作！这说明有人看重你的成熟和经验，别因为试图模仿那些年轻的野蛮人而让他们失望。
退休，男，63岁
译者/杨远
http://www.ftchinese.com/story/001036147
Recently I changed jobs, moving from an environment where most of my colleagues were comfortably middle-aged, to one where most are roughly half my age. Now, when I agree to attend a meeting I am told my response is "awesome!" or possibly "wicked!" My new colleagues seem preoccupied with television programmes I know nothing about. They also appear to lead, shall we say, far more active and demanding social lives than I do.
Should I try to fit in a bit better? Or must I remain an ageing curiosity, a sort of embarrassing elderly relative? Help.
Consultant, male, 53
Lucy's answer
If your young colleagues really did view you as an embarrassing elderly relative, then that would be bad. But I doubt if they do. I don't see how talking properly and not watching The X Factor on telly is particularly embarrassing. I doubt if they see you as excessively elderly either. At 53 you still have another couple of decades of working life before you. And I'm certain they don't see you as a relative. No one takes the office-as-family thing that seriously.
On the other hand, if they see you as an ageing curiosity, that is all to the good. You are ageing and you are a curiosity, as you wear your trousers higher than they do. Being a curiosity is necessarily a good thing as it implies that your young colleagues are vaguely interested in you – which beats them regarding you with indifference or hostility. In general, being different at work should be an advantage, and if I were you I would emphasise that difference rather than try to eliminate it.
So no, you need not try to fit in at all. Indeed, if you make any efforts in that direction you will almost certainly look ridiculous and fail. One of the great things about being 53 is that you should have confidence not to care much about whether you fit in or not. Presumably you have made enough friends already, and aren't looking to share their tiringly strenuous social life. Instead what ought to matter from your point of view is that your young colleagues respect you and accept your opinions might be worth listening to.
What you don't say is what you feel about your young workmates. Do they amuse you? If not, then you may well have problems rubbing along nicely with them. You don't need to fit in with them but you do need to be interested in them. If you are not, then feign it. Seeming interested will make them like you a lot more, and in time you may become rather fond of them.
A friend who recently retired at 60ish from a law firm says that the only thing that he misses about work is contact with the young.
Actually I think you're rather lucky. I'd love it if anyone ever said I was awesome for merely attending a meeting. Such raw enthusiasm sounds rather sweet.
Your advice
Grey = wicked
It's a wonderful thing to have a few grey hairs in an office of whippersnappers. It gives you completely unearned authority simply by dint of your age.
You should reinforce this by wearing timelessly classic clothes, confining your cultural references to timeless classics, and suggesting timelessly classic restaurants for lunch. Gradually you may find that your colleagues will start dressing like you, speaking like you and eating in the same places as you. Wicked. Grey-haired male director, 42
Find perspective
Yes, you do need to be awesome. Older people still tend to be more expensive, less energetic and slower learners.
To earn your keep, you need to demonstrate your value. Just being older is no defence unless you are lucky enough to work in Japan. To be awesome in your 50s you need to bring a new perspective. Consultant, male, 58
Get match-fit
Get fit. Seriously, fitness gives off energy, makes age beside the point. Male, anon
Be magnificent
When the same thing happened to me, I started using words like "splendid", "fabulous" and "magnificent".
After a few weeks of muffled laughter, the younger generation actually started to copy me. Trendsetter, male, 49
Big up the past
There is nothing to sharpen the interest of a 20-something like a tale of past revelry and exuberance.
If they wax lyrical about their healthy living, politically correct granola-cycles, drop in a few stories of the City in the time of Thatcher. You will soon have a reverence and distinction without losing any credibility. Male, 33
Play to strength
Congratulations on getting a new job at 53! Somebody values your experience and maturity: don't disappoint them by trying to emulate the young Turks. Retired male, 63
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